Well the licensing worker called tonight.. apparently "it isn't looking like" they are going to grant the exemption. Because Danny got a BUI and DUI 11 (yes ELEVEN) years ago, we had to get a special approval, which they call an exemption.
We have been working with the county sense Feb 08'. We have gone to numerous classes, required and voluntary. We have gotten CPR and First Aid Certified. We have been through multiple hour long interviews with the adoptions worker (who we love). We have gotten all the records together for our pets, gotten the room ready for two lovely little ones, preferably a sibling set of two under the age of five. We were approved and referred over to the licensing department and then had ONE 45 minute interview with this woman who focused the entire interview about alcohol. We reminded her that although we go out with friends and yes we do drink on occasion, that at this time, we do not have the responsibility of children to come home to.
Her reasoning for denial is "lack of rehabilitation". Let me point out that not only did Danny go through all the required classes and pay all fines, and the fact that this was when he was 21/22 years old.... apparently that was not enough in HER opinion. And because she based this opinion after getting to know us for 45 minutes, we are being denied.
OH wait.. we are still waiting on the county attorney to agree that her reasons are legitimate. This means nothing! Once they approve her decision, she will call to let me know. Wow.. thanks!
At this time, Danny has placed a call to the adoptions worker, who actually took the time to get to know us, and approved us to see if there is anything she can do. If not.. then we have the right to appeal.. Hold on ladies and gentleman... we have a longer ride ahead of us... cause we are NOT GIVING UP!
p.s. I am typing this In tears right now.. I am so upset!
January 6, 2009
Not so good
Posted by Waiting Parents at 7:38 PM
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12 comments:
Oh boy. I'm so sorry that you have to go through all this - all you want is to care for a child in need of love! I understand them questioning a dui - however like you said - that was 11 years ago!! People change and mature. My thought and prayers are with you and your husband! Keep fighting!
I don't even know what to say to this. I am so shocked I can't even believe it. I am so sorry honey. It's ridiculous that one person with an obvious chip on her shoulder could make such a decision like this after 45 minutes. Don't give up. Love you!
Holy Frick! After all you guys have been through, after all of the time, preparation, energy and work you guys have done to make it to this point. This is so unfair and unjust. You guys are -WITHOUT A DOUBT- THE MOST deserving people I know. How the heck, and I don't mean to knock the system, but I will, how the heck do those other dysfunctional foster parents get approved? Lie through their teeth?! This is utterly disturbing. The license worker may have more than a chip on her shoulder to deny the exemption ... soul-less and merciless comes to mind.
I am so sorry you guys are going through this. You will pull through it, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Don't give up honey. Hopefully your social worker will put up a fight for you. Let me know if there is anything we can do, whether it's writing a letter, making a phone call, protesting in front of their offices..whatever it is we'll be there in an instant.
We love you both!
I am in complete disbelief!!!! I'm so very sorry.. I just can not understand how they can just base themselves off of something that occurred ELEVEN YRS AGO just like that! Everyone makes mistakes a some point or another (especially when we are young). He followed thru with it as he was required to do, and that should be the end of it. You both have been nothing but an open book with them on your lives (done everything that was required and some), this is just wrong. If you guys had reoccurring legal problems or were not stable individuals or something along those lines that would obviously be reason enough not to place a child/ren in that home, then that would be more justified. But that’s not even close to what the case is.
I know you guys are very upset, but appeal it as many times as it may take! do not let HER be the one to mess this up for you and your family after ONE 45min interview. I sure hope that the Adoption worker that Danny called (who actually took the time to get to know u guys) tries her best to see what she can do about this!
Try to keep your head up - you both have so many people who stand behind you and know what type of wonderful and loving individuals you are. If there’s ANYTHING we can do, we are there! Know that we ARE THERE! If we even need to write a letter to her, I wont even think once about it, I will be sitting down giving her all my reasons (as someone who has known you all her life) as to why you guys deserve this.
Know that we love you guys and are nothing but a phone call away if you need us. Hang in there..
*hugs*
Well like I said when I saw you earlier you have my support and love. Anything you need I will do and i have legal friends on my side to help fight this. I cant believe afterall the other people who have helped you get this far it comes to one person who has no brain to make such an important decision. I am here for you, to fight for you. Love you with all my heart.
Kristi, I can't begin to say how sorry I am. I wish there was something I could do. I will pray that you get great news. Don't give up! You and Danny were meant to be parents.
Oh Kristi, I am soooo sorry. There are no words to describe the heartbreak and disappointment I have for you both. Appeal, appeal, appeal. I hope you know that Jay and I stand behind you guys 110%. If you need anything, talk/vent, cry, scream, letters, distraction, anything just call me. We are here! You are in our thoughts.
Oh honey, I am so sorry. I know you both are strong and can make it through this. You two are wonderful people, and ARE going to make great parents!! You have my support and love. Please let me know if there is anything I can do, I am more than willing to help in any way I can.
Love ya.
My name is Jane I have two grandaughters that need a good foster home. Her mother is going into treatment I am glad for that however they need a mom who is home everyday because they are 2 weeks old and 18 months Please Email me so we can talk I would appreciateove
Jan you did not leave any contact information for me to contact you.
holy cow, i had no idea. granted my husband and i did not have that sort of issue, my husband did have an arrest on his record (false accusations of stealing from his old boss, so we had the same drama of proving he didn't really do it and all that) call me if you want to talk, our agency is amazing and they get tons of babies. (if it's what you want) you've seen my kids, they're pretty typical of our agency. the adoption worker from the agency we ended up adopting through was fantastic too, really understanding and i had a lot of explaining to do about my previous marriage, and she listened really well and really understood the situation by the time we were done.
btw, we finalize with theia on thursday!
That is total crap. Don't give up. We are certified and we have a similar situation- so it can happen and shouldn't be a big deal. Dont give up!
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